Fear and Loathing in Iqaluit

Commentary by Captain Paul Watson

Hey Finance Minister dudes, like, welcome to Canada, eh.

We have quite the venue for you all this year, hope you all have some really warm clothing because we’ve decided to teach all you bleeding heart Europeans a little lesson in Canadian culture.

Just a little payback for voting to ban imports of our baby seal pelts. You guys cost our wonderful sealing industry a whole two million dollars last year. But hey, it’s not the money, we’re Canadians eh and bashing in the brains of defenseless seal pups is a very important part of our national heritage.

Baby Seal Bashing Politics in the Great White North

Commentary by Captain Paul Watson

There is no other nation on the planet more associated with clubbing defenseless animals than Canada. Despite signs saying “baby on board the ice floes,” hundreds of uneducated East coast darlings of the public dole have this perverse fetish to inflict brutality on baby animals, most notably the baby harp seals.

Next month this pathetic group of sadistic pedophagophiles will troop to the ice at taxpayer expense to once again crush the skulls of helpless infant seals. There really is no market for sealskins or seal meat but the knuckle draggers from the Maganderthal Islands of Quebec and the archaic outposts of Newfie-land are desperate to satisfy their perverse lust to slaughter the helpless.

There are few animals on the planet as helpless and trusting as baby harp seals. Anyone can walk up to them, pet them, tickle them, photograph them, or bash in their brains and skin them alive.

And there are few men more brutally insensitive and more cowardly than the ignorant goons who torment them every spring.

The Final Assault on the Cetacean Death Star

Commentary by Captain Paul Watson

It has been two months since we began operations with Operation Waltzing Matilda. Two months ago, we began with three vessels. We now have two, having lost the Ady Gil when the Japanese whaler Shonan Maru No. 2 cut it in half and sank it on January 6th, 2010.

During the last two months, the Steve Irwin has engaged the Shonan Maru No. 2 in numerous skirmishes and the Sea Shepherd ships Bob Barker and the Ady Gil engaged the main body of the whaling fleet, a day that disrupted the whaling activities and ended with the destruction of our interceptor vessel.

After the sinking of the Ady Gil, the entire Japanese whaling fleet fled West with the Bob Barker and the Steve Irwin on their tail, and for the next 10 days they did not kill whales as they tried to throw us off their tail. They fled 3,000 nautical miles to the extreme Western boundary of the whaling zone they refer to as JARPA II. The Bob Barker continued to be trailed by the Shonan Maru No. 2.

We had to stop the pursuit when the Bob Barker needed our assistance to provide them with lube oil, and the helicopter on the Steve Irwin required an emergency repair as well. To shake off the Japanese security ship tail, we arranged to meet the Bob Barker in a place where we could safely transfer supplies. The Steve Irwin then returned to Fremantle and the Bob Barker returned to hunt the Japanese fleet.

The Bob Barker lost the tail of the Shonan Maru No. 2 when the Japanese had to desist from entering the territorial waters of Australia’s Heard Island.

Now the Steve Irwin, with helicopter repaired, ship refueled, and re-provisioned after a 48 hour turnaround in Fremantle is heading back to rejoin the Bob Barker to search for and pursue the whaling fleet again.